30 Days Of Jaye – Day 25: When She Will Not Care

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She will desire peace at the

Cost of war

Being both prisoner and soldier

Believing if she fought harder

Bleed more

And denied her own

Thirst for more

Hunger for justice

and sight for more

Then she will be enough

When her body no longer

Blushes with your coming

Has peace with your going

And all love becomes an act.

The weapons of he warfare

Time, body energy

Have been taken as spoils

And she will do all allowed

To pull herself back together

Your touch no longer soothes.

The heat that was there has

Cooled…

With the turning of

Her head…the love is dead.

she will put self above love—

and nothing else will matter

JBHarris, 11.20.20

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30 Days Of Jaye – Day 24: Honey & Vinegar

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I want to spit

Remembering every time

I told you that I loved you—

every time

I kissed you

every time

I close my eyes

to remind myself

of what peace

and love look like.

in the middle of hurricane wind

and hellfire knowing that

the desire you had for me

was only contingent

on “how quiet I would be”…

reliance fiercely on what

you knew I would become

because I would become

anything…for you.

because I was you, was a part of you.

because I would’ve was a part of you

I could not be without you

and now that the hurricane is over,

and the winds have gone

and the sun has come.

I want to spit

every time

I think of how deeply

I loved you

—-and meant it

-JBH, 12.8.2020

30 Days Of Jaye – Day 23: Ghosts

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What do I do

Now when what you

Left me with

Haunts me…

And with all resolve

As faith gives

I send it back to

You.

The love was mine—this is mine.

I give this back to you!

I will not leave you to rest!

When it calls to you

from the depths of

what you thought

was dead

to quicken you

with kisses warm

and love a deep

reminding you of just

what you held on

for the glimpses of

future hidden in

past if I were

To just give you

more time

“You know

I love you

You know

she cannot be

what you are to me…”

Wait for me

you are my heart

love of my life…

there’s a chance

wake me from

summer willing my heart

to start all over again

so the wedding

won’t be so hard

this time perhaps

-JBHarris, July 2021

30 Days Of Jaye – Day 21: Mirror, Mirror On The Wall

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He said that

He saw me as perfect…

All pristine and to be

Protected by what

he called

Love.

Heavy and encompassing

Like new snow,

Making me into what

He thought, what he saw

And to squirm from

Under his hand

Was indeed tyranny.

How dare I have

Passion and self

Outside of his

Selfishness—

To see his passion

As novOcaine

Filling my body

With his desire

Never my want

And my blood to

Numb from what

Burned around me.

I closed my eyes

Made myself

Relish the heat

Of this passion

And recoil from

Whatever was cold

Outside of his touch.

He became my mirror.

I could not see

Me without him.

-JBHarris, April 2021

30 Days Of Jaye – Day 20: Why Is He Free?

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Written after the attempted murder/lynching of 16 y/o Ralph Yarl by 84 y/o Andrew Lester in the KCMO area. He shot Ralph bc he knocked on his door to pick up his siblings on 4/16-17.

It was the wrong door.

Shaun King brought attention to this incident and he is now arrested.

Our own domestic terrorism

Being product of our

Own capture

When those who

Bought us–have no more use for us.

When “Black and” is

Weapon and warning

While the weapon of our

Most current warfare,

Is not of this world nor

The principalities therein.

We are sheep among wolves.

Rabbits outrunning foxes.

Finding our own funds

Making our own guns

To make sure no White Knight

Enters our Black Day

Because we really want to know–

Why is he free,

And I am not?

-JBHarris, 4.18.23

30 Days Of Jaye – Day 19: Ode To Lisa Turtle

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All hail the first

Black girl of this

Modern era

Who showed how

Fashion and moxie

Always work together.

Who gave looks

And self

Pouring through our

Televisions, reminding

All the girls that look

Like her

We were always

To be seen.

Ugly?

Tuh!

We don’t know her.

Before Dionne

And after Carmen,

And Joesphine

And before Beyonce–

There was Lisa.

Reminding us

That pretty and Black

Always go together.

-JBHarris, 4.17.2023



30 Days Of Jaye – Day 18: Today I Am Gunpowder

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This piece will be in the coming work WHY THE ZOOM CAMERA STAYS OFF.

Being Black in Corporate is hard. -JBH

Today I am gun powder

Dry hot volatile.

Not for the scary neither am I for the amateur.

Today I am gunpowder

ready, quiet, and steady.

Today I am gunpowder–

loaded and full of heat

to the point that my feet are hot

when I walk on every piece of ground

fortunate of my reign

of my frame houses

Today I sit at my desk

wondering is today

the day I realize

my own power

and use that–

launch out of here

until I get to

where I’m supposed

to be at!

Today I am gunpowder…

Let the rebellion of

my ancestors with

a rifle in hand

ready and willing

and able to die for

such freedom

so that my children

will never know

the lack

Or wait

Or doubt

of what it is to be

Free-

Today I am gunpowder.

let my own pride be

the fuse–

refusing to bow

refusing to be shaken

and destructive

and all the tries to box me in.

-JBHarris, 7.12.2021

30 Days Of Jaye – Day 16: Hope

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This piece is in the work THOUGHTS IN A PANDEMIC. I was a Patient Care Tech during COVID-19’s initial onslaught in 2020. I had to write in hope. I had to write hope. -JBH

My shoes have

Hard soles

Inserts and memory foam.

The floors are concrete

And my feet and legs hurt

Without the comfort

Of the leopard print

Compression socks.

Body made hard and

Soft at the duty of

Being guardian of

The living, the quick and the dead.

Life is coming

In the rolling thunder

Wrapped in coalition

Of color down a hall.

Beautiful are the feet of those

Who bring the good news.

Life is coming.

Life is here.

Life is on the way.

-JBHarris, July 2020